Dear Jeriah,

2020 has been an unforgettable year and it gets more memorable by the day. Although I can credit this year to a fair share of turmoil as I’ve empathized with my community and grown fearful of what you will one day learn as COVID-19 and social injustice, in contrast it has also allowed me to become my most courageous self. In February, I found out that I would become a mother to you. In February, my life started to change, RAPIDLY.

Son, you give me courage.

2020 has been an unforgettable year and it gets more memorable by the day. It only took 9 months for me to get out of the habit of fearing the future. I say ‘only’ because that’s something I’ve done since always and the news of you somehow slowly deteriorated that negative self work. I’m forever working on that but Mama (yes, that’s me) is the most vigilant in prayer than she ever has been. It took 9 months out of 31 years to apply what I already knew in the most effective way I know of. Taking a knee in more ways than one really changes things. (Big shout out to Colin Kaepernick by the way).

Son, you activate my faith.

2020 has been an unforgettable year and it gets more memorable by the day. Mama didn’t realize how much she insulted God daily. I took advantage of time everyday almost. Excuse my language but I’ve been “getting my shit together” for a while now. The year of you, 2020, changed all of that. You being here makes me want to REALLY “get my shit together” a little bit everyday. I don’t want to put anything off anymore. I simply want to factor in everything a little bit at a time on an active day to day basis. You deserve a well put together foundation, and that is what you’ll have.

Son, you light the fire in me.

Together we will do life and unlock its joys as mother and son. Your relationship with dad matters but I selfishly say that I’m more intrigued by how ours will unfold. I’m excited to peek into the wonders of my mind of what the future may hold for you. It’s just the thought of your happiness that keeps me striving and keeps me grounded. I can say with confidence I’ll never have another day of feeling ’empty’ on this earth, even when things get tough. You have filled me, overwhelmingly with love and hope. This is not just life anymore, everyday with you is the best of life in ABUNDANCE.

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