3 months may not seem like a very long time but when you’re REAL LIFE “adulting” out here in these streets, 3 months can feel like 3 YEARS. November 9, 2017, that was exactly 3 months ago in which my life started to change, for the better. No, there’s not significance in that date, except it’s exactly 3 months ago. I just know it was the beginning of the END of an era that I’m not EVER going to miss. I’ve closed SEVERAL chapters in my life since then and in retrospect—there were no better choices I could make.
I’m not here to take up too much of your time today. So let me drop these 3 hot and harsh truths that life has curve balled me with:
- NO ONE WILL SUPPORT YOU, UNLESS YOU SUPPORT YOURSELF.
Actually growing a nerve big enough to start a brand, cultivate a website, place myself in the spotlight to one day become a public influencer—-that took much longer than what some may think. As I’ve mentioned a few times before, Being VeeKay was birthed in 2015 but it took it a while to come to light. I knew what I wanted but I felt like no one cared or would understand. My best friend saw all this within me before it ever came into fruition. I slept on myself for so long it was second nature. He constantly reminded me of my snooze pattern and that I needed to make a move. Whenever we discussed our ‘future plans’, he made it his business to let me know that I was basically wasting time. It’s not that I wasn’t listening, I really just didn’t believe in myself like I knew I should. In turn, that made me feel like no one else did. Well, when I finally had my moment of awakening, I realized that the whole time I was missing a key component, FAITH. With each day, as I get busier with placing more and more focus into my brand, I finally understand that while I was waiting on someone to cheer me on, I should’ve been doing that for myself all the while. So now that I’m finally out of the sunken place, I still have moments where I feel a lack of support. However, I’m learning not to read too much into that for several reasons. Furthermore, it doesn’t matter anyway. Because I support ME! I recite mantras everyday to keep a reassuring voice in my mind. I make sure to stay spiritually inclined. I follow positive accounts on all of my social media handles; that’s to keep me up and feeling great about myself! So here’s the harsh truth: NO ONE CAN TRULY SUPPORT YOU IF YOU DON’T SUPPORT YOURSELF. No one can hold you up if you don’t try to stand on your own. Yes, people will be there to boost your morale but you must have an ESTABLISHED confidence in who you are and what you do. I mean really. A fan needs good reason to support you. Beyonce did not gather a BEYhive because she stood still. People are attracted to confidence. So a little advice to whoever may need it, BE PROACTIVE IN BELIEVING IN YOURSELF. Build a confidence bank by depositing into yourself ev-e-ry-day!
2. NO ONE WANTS TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY.
As I pinch the space between my eyes while contemplating this, I’m nothing short of disappointed in myself for taking this long to truly grasp this. I found myself in a few situations here lately where I found myself apologizing when I truly felt I hadn’t done anything wrong. It was all to keep peace. Was the peace kept? Nah. Not really. As an adult, I absolutely have no issues with owning my own shit. NO PROBLEMS with that. However, in my experience, most adults DO have an issue with that. I’ve never understood why people choose their egos over being practical in fixing a conflict. I’m not sure if pride is the culprit or if some people really are in that dire of a need to be seen as a non-conforming, straight up-n-down, I don’t care one way or the other individual. People like that, in my opinion, probably shouldn’t have too many interactions with anyone. Anyway, I said all that to say that I’m never apologizing or feeling bad for others’ who are Ray Charles to their own bad choices or behaviors ever again. I’m not a psychologist, I’ll never try to pretend to be or become one. What I do know is that most grown-ups are only children in adult bodies — including myself. The difference between others and myself, though, is that I would rather choose to be the child of peace. Something like a lil’ Hey Arnold. But I’m also no fool. So moving on!
3. NO ONE CARES.
I didn’t mean to sound so grouchy lol. But this is one of those hard, adult lessons everyone learns sooner or later. Yes, there are a select few in your lifetime who will care about you and your livelihood. However, there’s more people who won’t. Now, I grasped this by observing and living through the bs that’s gone down in a former place of employment. Y’all, I’m not the first it’s happened to, but it happens all the time, too much of the time. BUDGET CUTS, LAYOFFS, POOR TREATMENT IN THE WORKPLACE…These are just examples of how a person can quickly become a pawn; a pawn in someone else’s game. Look at the judicial system. It’s horrible. Several scenarios come to mind when thinking of how this world DOESN’T care about one another as much as it should. (BIG SIGH)
(BIG ASS SIGH)
That’s another post for another day. And even though we live in a world where people would rather not care for other people, spread love anyway. If more people practiced the medicine of love, there wouldn’t be so much evil poisoning and killing off souls!
Hopefully you all got something from my harsh realizations. May not be so shocking or harsh to some of you but that was definitely the experience for your girl. SO! LIKE, SHARE, AND PLEASE COMMENT. TELL ME WHAT YOU LIKED, HATED, OR SOME OF YOUR OWN HARSH TRUTHS IN THE PAST 3 MONTHS OR 3 YEARS IF YOU’D LIKE 🙂 Come back on Vee-Day, I mean Valentine’s day, for a special treat! Thanks for reading!