5 Things I Wish I Knew Before Turning 21

#BEINGREFLECTIVE

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 REGRET. The picture you see is before I had any. I was just turning 21 and I had NO idea what was up ahead. Not only that, I had no idea that there were some things I could have done differently until I got a bit more experience under my belt. Although we like to believe that we are all free from anything that our pasts hold, we also know that’s the farthest thing from the truth. Regret is something we don’t like to discuss. WHY? Because regret causes shifts in a confident spirit. Things that you may have thought that you were relinquished from, things that you thought you had moved past, they somehow seem to surface. And once they penetrate your mind, those thoughts do a damn good job of destroying newly acquired peace and joy. NO ONE likes to bring up regrets. However, that’s sorta what I’ll be doing today. Let me be clear, I’m proud of who I am and I can say I needed the things that happened to me to happen, or I wouldn’t BEing VEEKAY. But, I can say these are a couple of things I REGRET not knowing before I turned 21! Lol.

1. To be successful, college is not required. Now, this is in no way to undermine the importance of a college education and the LENGTHS it can take you. As a college graduate, who didn’t truly know herself during her college years, getting a degree was probably thee most beneficial move I’ve made in life. I’ve been afloat (in a sense) ever since. But there’s an annoying stigma that has plagued Millenials by way of those before them. You know, the one that says if you don’t own a degree, you don’t have a future, THAT’S SUCH A LIE. Take some time to really get to know people in your community. You’ll see success packaged in various forms. A large percentage of them are entrepreneurs who either (A) never had a degree, or (B) has a degree that’s not being used. Before you think about what that percentage could be, that takes me to my second ‘shoulda knew this before 21’ point.

2. Know Yourself Before You Profit Yourself. Okay, in relation to this topic, the word “profit” will be used for 2 terms, both “losing” AND “winnin’.” To explain why profiting yourself may be a loss, I’ll just say this: If you invest your time, energy, attention, and money in the WRONG future, it can have what seems to be, never-ending consequences. For example, you go to school for 4 years, leave about 40K broker, land a job you absolutely HATE, and no matter what you do, you can’t seem to like it. You are most def. in a losing situation where mental, emotional, and maybe even financial woes destroy your best work ethic. However, there’s a huge possibility that can all be turned around, or prevented altogether. I learned that all you need to do is KNOW YOURSELF. Ok, I know you’re thinking, “How would I know myself at 18?” But you do! You know your ’18 year old self” at 18. Not even thinking in the grand scheme of things, all it takes is who you are in that day and time because that’s what it’s going to take. Essentially, we know who we are. We know what we’re going to focus on and what we’re not. We know what we like and don’t like. At 18, I LIKED going to school. I LIKED the idea of higher education. That was my motivation. Plus I had already been ruined with the thought that I had to go anyway lol. Whatever the reason, I knew I would focus on it because ultimately, I knew it was what I wanted to do. Even if you’re not for certain what you want to do, that’s ok. As long as you’re productive in your waiting, it’s fine. We all have the answer to those questions that can determine a long-standing decision. That’s my point. Before you go getting yourself into a situation of wasted resources (Time, Energy, MONEY) on something that may not work, try your best to understand yourself and your passions… That’s what you want to invest in. Yeah, yeah I know that’s called a learning experience. And yeah! We know that it STILL may not work out but whatever! Passions are still profits. That takes me to #3.

3. Never let ANYONE tell you that YOUR passion isn’t a profit because it most definitely is! There is a market for EVERYTHING, whether you think so or not. There are other like-minded individuals ready to take advantage of your products or services! Now, what I can’t tell you is if that market is a big one LOL. I’m sure it could make you money but I can’t guarantee that it’ll make you rich, let alone keep you afloat. Here is the part where you take your common sense and apply it to your circumstances. A regular job may be something you’d want to have on the side (more like in the front)! LOL. Ya’ll get my drift.

4. People are first and last priority. As a Christian woman, I have a heart to serve in any way I can. I’m a firm believer in giving and helping. For some of those very reasons that is why I chose a career in the health field. I think it’s humane to say that people are priority because we share this world and we should look after one another. While this may be true, people are crazy. Mean. Rude. Controlling. Over-protective. Clingy. Envious. Overbearing. Mentally ill. The list goes on but most importantly, all people are IMPERFECT. That’s all the reason to not listen to too many of them regarding the way you live your life. I’m not saying not to seek or take wise advice. What I’m saying is, never let anyone constantly impose on you what THEY feel is best. YOUR path in life will not be traveled by another pair of feet but your own. Constantly accepting someone else’s idea of you will scare away your own hopes and dreams. And ultimately lead you to resentment. REGRET.

5. Which brings me here to number 5. Before I turned 21, hell before I turned 28 LOL, I wish I had known not to REGRET. Yeah, my introduction was actually my #5. I wish I had known not to regret because regret is really what brings heartache. Yeah, the actual event of the let-down hurts. The fact that x, y, and z never happened, hurts. Yes, these things hurt but I learned that regret turns sadness into grief. Obsessing with ‘shoulda,’ ‘coulda,’ and ‘woulda,’ is a surefire way to keep you down. I’ve learned to live by the notion that we shouldn’t regret ANY of the steps we’ve made to become the esteemed individuals we are today. And even if you don’t believe that your past failures have done you a solid, I’m sure there are other people out there who beg to differ. My faith tells me that one day, when you understand that you went through your worst to become your best version, you’ll never regret again.

What are some things you regret not knowing before 21? I’m continuing this series so I’ll drop 5 more soon. The next post will be a bit harder to write, it’ll be more personal. Like, share, comment! The good, the bad, the ugly, the BEST! I wanna hear it all… until next time…

#LoveVeekay

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